What do you think is the best way to deal with uncertainties in life? Well, according to the American Psychological Association, the answer is to become more resilient, feel more confident in our ability to handle even the things out of our control. And today we will go into how to do that exactly, but first let’s see the two things that lay the right foundation for this to be truly effective.
3 Key steps to deal with uncertainties
1. Stop that stress response
The very first thing is to stop the stress response… feeling restless physically and mentally wallowing in all kind of catastrophic expectations, like everything that could possibly go wrong is surely going to go wrong.
This is all part of cognitive distortion to keep us safe, our survival mechanism kicking in to keep us away from, or keep us ready for the worst thing that could happen.
But, if we don’t know how to step out of this at the right exit point, it can overwhelm us into inaction because it makes all the uncertainties feel more daunting than they actually are.
A. The antidote –
It’s really tough to think rationally, think straight when the body is shutting down everything except what’s essential to stay safe and survive the threat.
But the thing is, when we deal with uncertainties, we are not usually dealing with any real danger, only what we see as a threat, it is perceived danger.
And so the best antidote to that would obviously be perceived safety – having a plan of action or strategy ready to deal with that threat.
B. Boost that confidence –
The quickest way to get our confidence up in our ability to come up with a solution is to think about our past successes… even if those aren’t remotely connected to the current situation.
This takes the power out of catastrophic thinking because it puts our focus on how we have been able to effectively deal with uncertainties in the past.
So, stop and ask, “I have figured things out in the past and if I have done it before, I can do it again. So what can I do about this now?”
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But, if it still doesn’t bring up a clear way for you to deal with those uncertain situations, then use this next step.
2. Access rational thinking to deal with uncertainties
When we can’t see a way out, it means we are too close to something to see the complete picture clearly. See, the first thing we notice when anything happens is how we feel about it – angry, happy, sad, jealous. That done, we take a step back and see what’s making us feel that way, like “I am so angry because he said that to me.”
We are emotional beings first and rational thinkers next. And rational thinking is what brings us solutions and action plans.
A. If you have a strong imagination –
So, to see the situation more clearly, take a step back using the third party operator of perceptual repositioning.
It’s about detaching emotionally from the situation by acting as if you are looking at the whole thing unfold as a story on Netflix. So, what other angles to the situation can you see now?
Looking at the problem this way helps turn the volume down on our emotions and tap into the rational thinking mode.
B. If your analytic skills are stronger –
Instead of what you don’t want to happen, focus only on the things that you want to happen… and see what all you can do to tip the scale more in your favor.
What can you do about the things in your control and how can you influence more in your favor those uncertainties which are out of your control.
Thinking this way disengages our emotions because we are thinking analytically… and so it becomes easier to come up with rational strategies and plan of action.
3. Build confidence to be comfortable with uncertainty
Now that we know how to get back in control, it’s time to see how to become more resilient, deal with uncertainties confidently. Like those people who always seem to know what to do in any situation and is usually the best person to have by your side in any emergency.
To know the 2 things needed to build the skill of dealing with stressful situations effectively – a framework to adapt to any situation confidently, watch the video up top.
I hope you found this useful.
