“Breathe. Calmness is a human superpower. The ability to not overreact or take things personally keeps your mind clear and your heart at peace.”
-Marc & Angel Chernoff
That just about sums up what some of the most effective coping strategies for stress are based on – not overreacting or taking things personally.
Stress in itself isn’t necessarily bad. How we handle the stressors is what makes the difference.
As a person with anxiety, I tend to find the negatives more easily in any situation. ‘What if’ followed by everything that could go wrong. This, in turn, adds to the stress and everything just starts to unravel from there.
The best way to handle such a reaction would be to let these thoughts be there and not fight them. Instead, find the solutions to every scenario playing out in your head. That way you’re ready for any situation. It may not be what you’d have preferred, but it certainly would be better than how you’d have reacted if caught unawares.
This strategy has helped me avoid a lot of potentially embarrassing situations because I seem to have a knack for reacting weirdly in unexpected situations : )
Think about some of your past stressful situations. Don’t they look less life-altering now in retrospect? Do your reactions to them feel a tad bit too serious now? Were some of the things that you took personally turned out to be really not about you?
What’s important to remember here is that we are talking about daily stressors & not the ones that are more suitable for expert professional intervention.
LIST OF CONTENTS
- What are positive coping strategies
- 5 coping strategies for stress
- How does stress affect our health
- Types of stress coping strategies
- Motivational quotes to help manage stress better
- The takeaway
What are positive coping strategies for stress?
The strategies that help us cope with stress, keep us functional in a stressful situation and boosts our mental health are called positive coping strategies.
We all have our own unique ways to deal with stressful situations, right? It can be stress eating, getting one too many drinks, worrying yourself to a pulp, snapping at every second person or item in your way, and so on.
But only those actions that help us deal with stress in a way that doesn’t affect our mental or physical health are truly helpful.
Here are a few ways that I use to take the steam out of any stressful situation and make it work for me. You can use these as a starting point for creating your own list of strategies that seem most likely to work for you.
Related:
Emotional Resilience – How to Stay Strong and Not Stress Out
5 Coping strategies for stress
While we may not have much control over our defense mechanisms like becoming offensive to avoid shame or guilt, coping mechanisms are conscious actions. They are more purposeful. It means, coping skills can very much be intentionally developed.
Coping with stress is a process. So it’s better to use a combination of different healthy coping strategies depending on your personality & what suits the situation best.
Situations that can be changed would require problem-solving strategies. But unchangeable stressors like loss of a loved one would require emotionally supportive strategies like social support, therapy, or emotionally supportive relationships.
1. Problem-solving attitude:
The first thing you can do when starting to feel stressed is to take a step back and try to find what part of the current situation is making you uncomfortable. Then try to visualize it as someone else’s problem and think what advice would YOU give if they came to you for guidance.
See what happened here? You turned it into a problem to be solved instead of a roadblock. Every problem HAS a solution, no matter how obscure it may seem at the moment.
Say, for example, going to a certain event is stressing me out. I try to imagine what if one of my friends was facing this problem and came to me for advice.
- What would I ask her?
- Was she worried about anything in particular like public speaking, not knowing anyone there, not being perfectly ready yet, or any other such thing?
- What would I advise her as a workaround for those problems?
- What pep talk would I give her?
Then, I write down all possible solutions and pick the easiest one or the least daunting one of these. This exercise will take your mind off the emotions involved and engage a different part of the brain that handles problem-solving.
Taking yourself off the equation in a stressful situation (even if imaginary) is an effective coping strategy for stress as it reduces the brain’s fight or flight stress response.
Related:
How to Use the Power of Positive Thinking – Overcome Limiting Beliefs
2. Baby steps:
If it turns out that the mile-long list of things to be handled for any task or situation is freaking you out, do what I ask my 10-year-old son to do. When he simply gives up any schoolwork just because there is way too much to do, I break up his tasks into chewable bits that I know he can handle easily. Then I ask him to just do the first one.
When he finishes that, I give him the second one. After a while when he gets comfortable with how easily he can handle each task, he jumps onto the next one pretty happily. I do the same when I have a mountain of to-dos to handle. I write the whole thing down into manageable chunks and take baby steps.
At worst, even if you aren’t able to complete all the tasks, at least you would be stress-free and would’ve moved forward instead of staying rooted to the start line worrying your head off, right?
It’s like looking at a 1000-page book and saying, “l can never ever finish that”. Start with 1 page a day and move up from there.
Breaking down overwhelming tasks into manageable chunks is one of the most effective coping strategies for stress.
3. The why-and-who method: Coping strategies for stress
When something is stressing you out, go for what I call the why-and-who method. Ask yourself why are you doing that particular task or why do you need to show up. Who would it affect the most if you just dug your heels and said No?
The answers would either motivate you or show you that they don’t actually add anything to your life, making it easier to dispense with them.
Let me show you how. Once I took up a freelance writing gig that was boring as hell, taking up literally all my waking hours, paying peanuts, and doling out stress in bucket loads with its looming extremely tight deadline…phew. After sending progress updates for a couple of days, I took a step back and went into the why and who of it.
I realized that I needed to complete this task satisfactorily and on time as the client’s feedback would add to my newbie freelancer portfolio and help me get better work. This took the stress and boredom off from the whole situation.
It shifted my perspective into looking at it as a task to further me professionally and not as a low-paying dull, dumb job.
Remember, keeping your mind clear & heart at peace
4. Timeout and tune out:
Take some time off and do something totally unrelated to what’s stressing you out. Go on a long walk, feed the birds in your nearest park, do your grocery shopping or volunteer at the animal shelter. Do whatever gets your mind off the situation that’s stressing you out.
I like to either paint, rearrange my closet (is that weird?) or dig into an old favorite from my PG Wodehouse collection. Time has a tendency to put a different perspective on things. And we have already seen the power of shifting perspective, right?
If time’s a luxury and you are on a tight schedule, take 10 minutes off and breathe. Breathe with intention and mindfulness. The 10 minutes stolen from your tight schedule will not only help complete the task more efficiently but will calm your mind as an added bonus.
Relaxed deep breathing is an essential part of most coping strategies for stress.
Related:
Relaxation techniques: Fun Stress Relief activities
5. Coping strategies for stress: Reach out
Everything deserves a second chance. Before quitting something because it’s too stressful, seek help. Reach out to your family members. Talk
Saying out loud what’s bothering you will help vent the negative energy. It’ll also put some distance between you and the emotional part of the stress. You might even get some helpful advice or get a new perspective on things that show how things aren’t happening ‘to you’, but ‘for you’- calm your ‘why me’.
Find and join communities online for support if opening up about your issues to friends & family seems tough. Getting behind a screen sometimes helps better open up about your situation.
Believe me, no matter how unique you think your situation is, there always are people going through something similar. You just have to put in the effort to find them.
I have found community members to be compassionate, helpful and with
Related:
How to be happy – Choosing happiness as your reality
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How does stress affect the body
Stress can keep us motivated & focused, but letting it add up & become overwhelming can cause a lot of mental & physical issues. Any type of change can trigger stress because it requires us to break away from a pattern & step into the unfamiliar. Too much of it can increase the level of stress-related hormones making us feel physically unwell.
Our body responds to stress by getting into the “fight or flight mode” & so our breathing becomes faster, heart rate increases, blood pressure rises, & muscles become tight.
It can cause hives, atopic dermatitis, ulcers, headaches, back pain, fatigue, difficulty breathing, & even affect blood glucose levels. Stress has also been found to worsen heart conditions, migraine headaches, hypertension, GI conditions, & suppression of the immune system.
Related:
Healthy mind & body: 8 quick breathing techniques for relaxation
What are the types of coping strategies
Coping strategies are techniques we use to maintain our emotional wellbeing amidst all the small & big stress life throws at us.
It doesn’t matter whether the events causing stress are positive or negative. Positive events like getting married, moving to a new house, better job, or anything significant & progressive in life can still stress us out. Coping strategies for stress help stop them from getting overwhelming, letting you enjoy these good moments thoroughly.
Based on their efficacy in the long run, along with their effect on our mental & emotional wellbeing, there are two types of coping strategies – healthy & unhealthy.
Healthy coping strategies:
Stress makes us feel trapped without an option to get out. So strategies focused on finding a solution can not only ease the situation but make us feel back in control of what’s happening in our life. And that’s always good for our mental & emotional wellbeing.
Self-care routines, releasing pent-up emotions constructively, or strategies to soothe & distract you will give your mind time to calm down & focus better on finding solutions.
Creating a plan of action, healthy boundaries, & finding how to change the situation will help you come out of what’s stressing you. Healthy coping strategies like joining a support group or seeking a mental health professional’s advice are very effective in maintaining emotional wellbeing.
Unhealthy coping skills:
Though maladaptive or unhealthy coping strategies can be effective in reducing stress, the relief is short-lived. Plus, their long-term effects are usually negative & often counterproductive.
Stress eating, reckless driving, alcohol or drug abuse, and even avoiding issues to will them out of existence are all short-term fixes that have unintentional long-term negative consequences.
How do you handle stress: inspirational quotes to help manage it
1. “Stress, anxiety, and depression are caused when we are living to please others.” – Paulo Coelho
2. “When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure.”
– Peter Marshall
“The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.”
—William James
4. “The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.”
– Sydney J. Harris
5. “If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago.” – E. Joseph Cossman
Related:
Moving On Quotes: How to Let Go and Be Happy
Here’s an interesting perspective on stress – tough times make life more exciting. They provide contrast to happiness, relaxation, joy, and smooth sailing in general. There’s no light without darkness.
Stress can push you to work harder, perform better or motivate to put in more effort but only when it doesn’t become overwhelming.
Choose whatever coping strategies for stress work for you, but don’t let overwhelm dictate the reality of your life. Take the steam out of stress and make it work for you.
So tell me, how do you stop getting overwhelmed with stress? Let us know your coping strategy in the comments below. You never know who your approach might help!
Taking the time off is definitely the best and most effective way for me. It’s what I usually do when I’m overloaded with stress! Haha. But I’ll try more on reaching out as well. I’m actually the type of person who usually keeps things to myself since I don’t really want to put on weight to anyone but I agree that reaching out to loved ones and family members can help too.
Yes, taking time off works best for me too! And I agree, reaching out can sometimes be tough if you’re considered the emotionally tough one in the family who can handle anything. But, I think just talking it out with someone who isn’t directly related to the issue can help…at least in getting the thing out…it sometimes gives you a different perspective on things
Breaking down the problem into small, easier to handle portions is so necessary! For my kids, even something as simple as cleaning a room needs to be broken down. I don’t ask them to clean their room. Instead, I tell them to pick up the clothes, then pick up the toys, etc…
Yes, it works great with kids too, isn’t it? When my son stresses out with too many school assignments to cover, I just ask him to start with the easiest or the smallest one…that way when he has only the big one left, he won’t be stressing out with how many more he has to cover…gets his work done faster
Thanks for this list! I actually do practise pretending my problems are someone else’s problems sometimes and it really helps, but I’m realising I can do more when it comes to dealing with stress!
Trying to visualize what you’ll advice if someone else is having the issue causing stress and following that advice yourself does help. Try out some other techniques too to find which one suits you best and is the easiest…after all, we are talking of reducing stress, right : )